I feel for you, I really do. And I also find this article validating because I realized I didn’t want kids sometime in my mid-20s and I’m very grateful that I never had them, despite the usual pressure from society and family about how I would be a great mom, and I would feel differently about kids when they’re my own kids… I don’t think I would’ve been a great mom and I certainly would’ve been miserable and it’s not that I don’t like kids, but I don’t like most people and that does include kids. Some kids are cool. Generally the older they are the more I like them. so I feel for you, I really do. But I also have to agree that kids see and observe more than we think they do. I hope you start to enjoy motherhood more. I have a feeling that when you start working outside the home again, you might look forward to seeing your child when you come home. Good luck!